I admire how secretly you show up once a year to tantalize my taste buds. I have a few secrets of my own. I
told myself yesterday the first step to getting well is admitting you have a problem. Today, Girl Scout cookies I'm coming clean about my love-hate relationship with you.
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways by eating...
- 10 boxes of Thin Mints while feeling like I'm at the top of a snow-capped mountain with the wind blowing through my hair.
- 8 boxes of those delicious lemon, snowy white, sugar-coated cookies I don't know the name of to keep our relationship simple with "no strings attached".
- 7 boxes of Samoas because I love Chinese things, fire, water...no,no,no...Polynesian things!
- 5 boxes of Do-Si-Dos for breakfast as I've heard my body needs protein within 20 minutes of getting out of bed. I wonder if the ones I ate in bed count?
- 1 box of Tresfoils for good measure remembering some 100-year-old Girl Scout grandmother that gave Juliette Gordon Low a recipe for shortbread cookies one beautiful 'hanging tree moss day" in Savannah.
- You ruin my diet every year. Have you ever considered baking cookies around the 'end of the year' holidays like everyone else?
- You make my eyes itch and water from an allergic reaction.
- You call my name from the pantry like some haunting in Connecticut. Could you be scarier please so I don't come every time you beckon me?
- You know you are irresistible with your good looks and taste. Do you have to have little girls with sweet voices and begging faces to sell you too?
- My husband (my true relationship) proudly brings home boxes of you. I smile at him and behind his back, scowl and stick my tongue out at you. I'll slap that smirk right off your box!
Much love and hate,
The Happy Handicap
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